The Animus Reunion of Chaos
by Yana Phoenix
Summary: It's 2014, Abstergo have created a project which involves Desmond, all of his known and interesting assassin ancestors, his friends and ancestor's friends. Yes half of them are dead but in this animus project they have the chance to live on and meet each other. However the project does not go to plan as attitudes clash, especially between templars and assassins. Unleash chaos!
1. Welcome to the Animus

"Where… where am I?" Desmond asked himself. He could not see because there was only darkness and there was no sound except for his breath. He did not feel a breeze but he did not feel like he was inside a room. In the distance a light faded, he took a step towards it and it became extremely bright and all he could see was white. He covered his eyes and groaned because it was too bright too fast for him to handle.

"Subject 17, welcome to the animus version 7.0" a loud voice boomed

"7.0?" he asked himself

"Uploading ancestors" the voice boomed again. A 27 year old Altaïr appeared a meter in front of Desmond. Desmond jumped back in surprise and bumped into a 30 year old Ezio

"Watch yourself signore" he said. Edward appeared to Desmond's left and on his right appeared Haytham and Connor. They all looked around in confusion and then looked at each other.

"Uploading memories" the voice boomed again causing the others to jump and panic a little. Malik and Maria Thorpe appeared either side of Altaïr, Leonardo appeared next to Ezio and Charles Lee appeared behind Haytham.

"Templar!" Altaïr shouted looking at Maria pulling out his hidden blade

"Assassin!" she replied pulling out her sword. Malik grabbed Altaïr and pulled him back

"No! She is a woman. Never hit a woman!" he shouted

"But she's a templar!" he argued while Maria smirked

"Synching with other subjects" the animus said in it's monotonous voice

"Other subjects?" Desmond quietly asked himself. Lucy then appeared half a meter in front of him. "Lucy?" he asked in disbelief.

"Where are we?" she asked in confusion

"Who are all you people?!" Leonardo shouted

Rebecca and Shaun then appeared either side of Lucy. Then a mass of confused voices crowded the animus. Altaïr was trying to attack Maria but was being pulled back by Malik while Maria watched them and laughed to herself.

"Charles Lee!" Connor shouted ignoring that he was in a strange new environment. He proceeded straight to punching Charles Lee in the face while Haytham tried to fight Connor off of Charles. Edward decided to back away with his hidden blades out ready to attack.

"What is happening? What is this?!" Leonardo shouted running circles around the crowd and freaking out. Ezio ignored his panicking friend and pushed Desmond out of the way to flirt with Lucy

"Buongiorno beautiful, what brings you here?" he asked her while she stared back in extreme confusion. She did not reply to him and he immediately felt the shame of rejection. Shaun and Rebecca immediately started arguing but Desmond could not figure out what it was about.

"Silence!" a voice boomed. Everyone stopped and looked around although they were unsure where to find the voice. This time it was not the animus. It was a man's voice "Welcome to the animus 7.0 project. You have all been chosen to take part in this abstergo experiment. Some of you may have died many years ago but do not remember because the animus has not uploaded your complete memories. In this case I welcome you to the future, the year is 2014. For those of you who are still alive in this time… Shaun and Rebecca you have been kidnapped and forced into this animus until you meet your doom. Now that you know why you're here, have fun! I am now collaborating the animus to set up an environment that you will all be familiar with. It is not too advanced for any of you. Since Malik is the oldest of all of us you will be placed in Masyaf. Oh I almost forgot to mention the best part! You can't die, however the pain you feel will be very real. Torture each other as much as you like, good bye for now test monkeys!". Suddenly the surroundings transformed and everyone was outside the gates to the Masyaf fort.

"Where are we?" Connor shouted finally realising that he was not in America

"My home" Altaïr answered looking at the place. Malik also looked at the place

"It's not really home. All the people are gone" he added

"Rebecca? What happened?" Desmond asked

"Well, the templars took yours and Lucy's DNA and they uploaded it all onto an animus. Your ancestors are also part of your DNA so they are here and then their memories are also here. They then managed to kidnap me and Shaun and they strapped us into animus like human guinea pigs. Now they've started a project to see if our combined knowledge can get them any closer to finding some sort of powerful weapon from the past civilisation." she explained

"What's is this so called DNA?" Ezio asked

"It's a part of your body that says who you are, it's in your blood and your skin" Rebecca answered

"Who are you people?!" Leonardo shouted still freaking out but also amused by the architecture and history that stood before him. Edward then stood forwards

"My name is Edward Kenway" he introduced himself. Haytham and Connor then both looked to Edward in shock

"Daddy?" Haytham asked. Charles and Connor sniggered a little at how Haytham sounded like a little boy. He then quickly corrected himself "umm... I mean. Father? Is that you?"

"What are you on about?! I don't have any children and you are far too old to be my son" he answered

"Actually… he is your son. You just don't know it yet." Shaun replied sighing to himself. All the introductions and explanations were going to take a long time.


	2. Settling In

After a long hour of clearing the confusion and explaining how everyone was connected each other and an extra 20 minutes calming Leonardo down, everyone decided to enter the Masyaf castle.

"So Desmond. Are you going to give us a tour of this place?" Rebecca asked

"How can he give you a tour? He has never been here! I have never seen his face before!" Malik shouted "I can give you a tour"

"No! I know Masyaf the best, I will do the tour" Altaïr interrupted

"You think you know everything best you ignorant fool!" Malik argued

"I will never sleep in an assassin hideout." Maria spat

"This is an assassin hideout?" Charles Lee asked

"Yes. This is where it all started. I remember from my history books" Haytham explained

"Amazing! To see the place where it all started!" Leonardo cried

"Well to be overly correct it didn't all start here. The hashashin tribe lived in the area many years before they chose to settle here" Shaun corrected smugly

"Shut up Shaun!" Rebecca shouted

"DIE CHARLES LEE!" Connor shouted running towards Charles. Charles jumped behind Haytham and Connor ran straight into Haytham's fist and landed on the floor

"Haytham you saved me!" Charles smiled holding onto Haytham's arm like a little school girl. Haytham gave Charles a death stare and Charles immediately get go "umm… I mean. Thanks chap."

"My father doesn't love me" Connor said picking himself up off the floor

"You're the one who disappointed me son by choosing to be an assassin." Haytham said

"It's Charles Lee's fault. Death to all templars!" Connor replied before being bitch slapped back to the ground by Maria

"You just got Thorped!" she shouted

"You're so beautiful when you're violent and angry" Ezio smiled stroking Maria's face, she blushed a little. Altaïr felt a slight pang of jealousy even though he was not aware that in his future he would marry the woman therefore he was feeling slightly confused.

"Hey! Am I going to show you all this place or not?!" he shouted walking over to Maria and grabbing her arm "This way" he said trying to drag her away from Ezio but she immediately flipped Altaïr so that he landed on his back.

"I'll lead myself she said" walking away

"Smooth" Ezio said sarcastically

"I can't believe you're my great great great great great great grandson" Altaïr growled picking himself off the floor. They both looked to see that the crowd had already moved and Maria was leading the crowd around Masyaf with Malik giving information about every place she walked to.

The tour continued, they found the gardens, the kitchen, the main eating hall, the library, the weapons room and the giant bathroom which was the only thing in the castle that had been modernised to toilet cubicles and working shower cubicles. They reached the last corridor which had all the bedrooms. The animus had also changed it so that there were fewer bedrooms than the original castle.

"This is bad." Malik sighed

"What's bad?" Desmond asked

"There are 13 of us and only 7 bedrooms. Some of us will have to share" he sighed. Ezio immediately ran next to Rebecca

"I'm sharing with this girl!" he shouted

"No you're not" Rebecca said walking away and standing next to Lucy "I'm sharing with Lucy". Ezio immediately ran next to Maria

"Then I'm sharing with this beautiful lady, she's better anyway." he winked at Maria. Maria kicked him in the groin so he dropped to the floor in pain

"I am not sharing with a man" she growled

"I'm sharing with Haytham!" Charles shouted grabbing onto Haytham's arm while Haytham face-palmed. Leonardo helped Ezio off the floor

"Ezio and I will share a room" he laughed while Ezio mouthed the words 'Help me!'

"I guess me and Shaun could share a room" Desmond calmly said

"No way! I am not sharing with this idiot." Shaun said causing offence to Desmond

"Then I don't mind who I share with" Desmond shrugged

"It's my castle! I get the spare bedroom." Altaïr growled

"It's my castle too idiot!" Malik argued

"If you love this place so much why don't you sleep on the stairs?"

"The spare bedroom is mine" Edward declared

"No! It's mine!" Maria stepped forward

"Charles Lee!" Connor shouted pointlessly while the other's looked at him in confusion.

"Here's an idea." Altaïr smirked "Why don't we fight for the bedrooms?". Shaun whimpered and immediately surrendered while Edward, Malik, Maria and Connor pulled their fists out. The first person to lose the fist fight was Malik because he refused to hit Maria and she kicked his ass, not to mention he was fighting with only one arm... The second person to lose was Altaïr because Maria distracted him with a cute smile and wink before kicking him in the groin. Maria then instantly lost after Edward punched her in the face. She fell onto the floor next to Altaïr and then apologised for kicking him in the groin. Edward and Connor then had an epic showdown but Connor lost when Charles Lee blew him a kiss for some strange reason.

"What the-?" His words were stopped by a punch to the stomach that winded him and then a bitch slap to the floor. He fell to the floor confused and scared, Edward helped him back up.

"I guess the spare bedroom is mine." he laughed

"You fool! You hit a woman" Malik shouted

"Calm down I've had worse." Maria said touching her face

"I will kill this fuck for you if you wish" Ezio said to her

"No it's fine." she said getting back up

"I don't believe this. I was beat by a girl. What sorcery is this?" Altaïr exclaimed

"Shut up Novice! I too was beat by a girl!" Malik shouted

After a long debate about who would share with who they decided that Lucy and Maria would share a room because Maria refused to share with a boy, Rebecca and Desmond decided to share a room because they knew each other best and Shaun annoyed them both. Ezio and Leonardo shared a room because they were best friends while Haytham and Charles shared a room believing in their templar power. Malik and Altaïr also decided to share a room because they had done it before when they were young assassins and finally Connor and Shaun shared a room because there was no one left to partner with while Edward had his own bedroom.


	3. Dinner Time

Evening came and soon everyone was hungry.

"Lucy I'm hungry, what's for dinner?" Desmond asked

"Do I look like your mother?" she answered annoyed

"Actually what is for dinner…?" Connor asked "And who is going to cook?"

"I'll cook for you! I make a wonderful spaghetti with meatballs!" Leonardo smiled while Ezio was hesitant

"You can't cook a meal for 13 people on your own." Ezio commented "You will need help."

"Good idea!" Altair added "You should help him"

"I'm not good at cooking" Ezio answered

"I don't cook either." Altair replied "Malik cooks!"

"No I don't." Malik replied

"I think Shaun should cook." Rebecca smirked

"I'm a historian not a chef" Shaun answered

"Lucy should cook" Desmond smiled

"No you should cook" she snapped

"I'll do it." Connor said "I'm hungry and we can't argue on who will cook forever."

"Two assassins cooking? They'll poison the bloody food for us templars!" Haytham shouted

"Then you go with them to make sure that doesn't happen" Edward suggested

"I have never cooked in my life" Haytham argued "And sending Charles in the kitchen with Connor is a bad idea"

"Then send Maria to cook with them. She'll make sure nothing is poisoned" Altair said. Everyone else seemed to agree so Leonardo, Connor and Maria were sent into the kitchen to cook.

In the kitchen Leonardo immediately got to work but he used curtains to hide what he was doing.

"Why are you hiding your cooking?" Connor asked

"I can not let others know the secrets of my genius!" Leonardo shouted

"You better not poison anything!" Maria shouted

"I would never!" Leonardo answered

"What are you going to cook?" Maria asked Connor

"Leonardo is making spaghetti or the main course so I will make cookies for dessert. Can you cook?" he asked her

"Of course I can cook!" she shouted "I'll make a salad and an appetiser" and after she said that they both got to work on making the dinner. After 30 minutes of hard work Connor had finished his cookies.

"Perfect!" he shouted looking proudly at the cookies he made. Maria rushed over and looked at the cookies too but with disgust. The cookies were shaped like Charles Lee being hung by rope and some other cookies said "Death to Charles Lee", "Death to all templars", "The British suck" or "Assassins Rule". One cookie even said "Charles Lee is gay for Haytham" while another said "'Murica fuck yeah!"

"Your cookies disgust and insult me." she growled

"But they taste good, here try one" he said shoving a 'death to all templars' cookie in her mouth. She spat it out but agreed that it was delicious. "Can I see what you made?" Connor asked

"Umm…" Maria hesitated. Connor looked to her area of the kitchen to see something that looked like mashed potato and hummus mixed with vomit and dead flies.

"What the fuck is that?" he asked in shock

"Well! I tried to make a potato salad and the potatoes went well but then the salad cream wasn't real salad and that didn't make any sense so I added some vinegar, hummus and gravy to add flavour otherwise the salad would have tasted bad and then the flies wouldn't stay away from my food so I killed them all…. in the food." she explained trying to justify her bad cooking

"You said you could cook!" Connor groaned

"Yes! Yes! My beautiful creation! It's alive!" Leonardo shouted from behind his curtain. Maria and Connor exchanged worried glances and they both pulled down the curtain but there was a lot of smoke so they couldn't see. Leonardo walked out of the smoke and when the smoke cleared Maria and Connor could not believe there eyes. A giant pile of spaghetti with meatballs was moving very slowly and making zombie noises. It crawled to where Maria's disgusting food was sitting and the giant spaghetti monster ate her inedible food.

"Oh my god." Maria said

"It's beautiful no?" Leonardo smiled excitedly

"What did you do to the spaghetti?!" Connor shouted

"I gave it the gift of life! It's amazing no?" he laughed. The spaghetti monster started moving towards Connor's cookies

"No! Not my cookies!" he shouted and he quickly saved the cookies before the monster could reach them. The spaghetti monster did not like this. It hissed and spat a green goo ball towards Connor. He expertly dodged the ball and it landed on the table. The table sizzled as the ball of green goo touched the table and it burned a hole in the table.

"It spits acid?" Maria said in surprise

"It's not supposed to do that" Leonardo said

"Daddy…!" the spaghetti monster groaned spitting another acid ball towards Leonardo. It touched his cape and he quickly removed it "Daddy eat me!" the spaghetti shouted. Leonardo ran out of the room screaming. Maria and Connor also did the same, the spaghetti monster slowly crawled out of the kitchen and disappeared somewhere within the castle


	4. Toilet Phobia

After the chaotic dinner it was quite understandable that some people would have needed to use the bathroom. However there was a problem. Ezio, Malik, Altair, Maria and Leonardo have never used a flushing toilet before because it wasn't invented during their time. Shaun realised this and decided to take the responsibility to introduce them to the toilet. He walked into the main hall where everyone was relaxing. "Alright, who wants to be potty trained?" he shouted. Immediately everyone in the room turned and looked at him in disgust except for Leonardo who was still searching for his spaghetti monster. "I mean which of you do not know how to use a flushing toilet and would like to learn?" Shaun explained. Most of the people in the room sighed with relief and continued what they were doing. Altair and Maria continued their argument and ignored everyone else in the room.

"How are you going to teach them? Drop a bomb right in front of them?!" Rebecca laughed

"Bombs? I have plenty" Ezio said not catching the joke

"No Rebecca, I am not going to excrete feces with an audience." Shaun said dryly

"I would like to learn how to use this so called flushing toilet." Malik said calmly

"Me too." Ezio said walking to Shaun "Andiamo (we go)" he grabbed Shaun's arm and walked out of the hall and into the bathroom while Malik followed them.

They reached the bathroom, on the left wall there were 5 toilet cubicles and on the right wall there were 5 shower cubicles. The cubicles were a lemon yellow colour which clashed horribly with the stone floor and walls. On the far wall there was a window to let light in and there were 2 sinks each on the left and right wall closest to the door. Shaun walked to the first toilet cubicle and opened the door. "This is a toilet." He explained "You do your private business here, so if you need to pee or do other things this is the place to do it."

"Do we squat on it?" Malik asked

"No. That is a toilet seat. You sit on it." Shaun explained

"It looks very clean… is it safe to drink from?" Malik asked further

"NO!" Shaun shouted "Why would you want to drink from a place where people shit?"

"People shit there?!" Malik gasped in surprise

"Have you been listening to a word I just said?" Shaun asked

"You were so vague… I had no idea what you were talking about." he sighed

"Can I release my love juice in here?" Ezio asked and Shaun immediately blushed

"Love juice, apple juice, orange juice. Yes anything!" he stammered while Malik sniggered

"The toilet looks so clean. Are you sure people shit in here?" Ezio asked

"Yes I'm sure" Shaun sighed

"So how does it all disappear?" Malik asked

"I'll show you now. It's the magic of flushing" Shaun smiled. He then pressed the handle of the toilet and water gushed into the toilet making a loud noise. Malik and Ezio immediately panicked

"Phantom! It's alive! It's out for revenge from all the shit it ate! Kill it!" he screamed backing away. Ezio urgently dragged Shaun out of the cubicle throwing him to the floor and shot the toilet 5 times with his hidden gun and the toilet stopped flushing. It then broke into two pieces and toilet water leaked all over the bathroom floor

"The beast is dead!" Ezio said triumphantly

"We're saved!" Malik cried while Shaun climbed back to his feet

"Not yet. We must ensure this never happens again. We must destroy the other four toilets" Ezio said reloading his hidden gun and running to the next cubicle

"No wait!" Shaun shouted "It's supposed to do that!"


	5. Girl's Night

It was late at night, everyone was in their bedrooms. Lucy and Maria lay on their beds talking about the other people in the house.

"What do you think of Altair?" Lucy asked curiously although she secretly knew that one day both Maria and Altair would be married. However Maria was not yet aware of it

"He's okay." she shrugged

"Really? You two argue a lot" she said

"Of course! He is always insulting my beliefs. He says that the templar order is evil but we're trying to help the world. His order is evil! They think they own everything and can kill anyone." she complained

"What if you were an assassin too?" Lucy suggested

"I would never become an assassin" Maria spat causing some insult towards Lucy

"Okay… so what if he were a templar. What would you think about him?" Lucy asked intrigued

"Well…" Maria started but the bedroom door opened. Both Maria and Lucy jumped and turned their heads to the bedroom door but they were relieved when they saw Rebecca walk in

"Sorry did I disturb you?

"No" Maria said hoping to change the topic

"It's just Desmond is snoring so loud, I can't sleep." Rebecca explained "Can I crash here for a while?"

"Sure" Lucy said without Maria's consent. Maria glared at Lucy. "Relax Maria, Rebecca is cool. I think we should have a girl's night" she suggested

"Sounds great!" Rebecca smiled and then she looked at Maria "If that's okay with you…" she added

"Yeah. We'll do that" Maria said glad that Lucy had forgotten the question she asked

"So I think we should give Maria a makeover." Lucy suggested "I've never seen her wear makeup before."

"Makeup?" Maria questioned, she had never used makeup before and she had the feeling that she did not want to

"Wait. Do you even know what makeup is?" Rebecca asked trying not to sound mean

"No…" Maria answered

"You probably haven't worn a bra before either. That should be part of the makeover" Lucy suggested

"A what?" the british girl stammered while Rebecca picked up her hand

"You have nice nails, we should paint them." Rebecca said dropping Maria's hand

"Is this normal for you?" Maria asked unsure of herself

"Yes very normal, Lucy's face doesn't look like that naturally. She uses makeup. And her boobs don't hold themselves up, she uses a bra. And I doubt you have ever seen anyone with natural red nails." Rebecca explained

"Oh she's wearing makeup… I thought she just needed a bath." Maria sighed while Lucy gasped in shock

"Excuse me?!" Lucy shouted

"That's what I was going to say" a voice came from the door. The three girls turned to see Leonardo standing in the doorway "I was going to say: 'Excuse me, have you seen my spaghetti monster anywhere?'"

"No we haven't." Rebecca said impatiently but Leonardo was distracted by the dressing table full of makeup and perfume and he walked over to the table

"What are these potions for?" he asked picking up a perfume bottle

"Those aren't potions." Lucy sighed "They're perfume and makeup. It makes you smell and look good."

"Oh they're not potions? I thought you were a witch." Maria blushed and Lucy glared at Maria

"You can change your appearance with these? Amazing!" Leonardo smiled "I must try it."

"Perfect! You can give Maria a makeover." Lucy grinned evilly. Leonardo was a man who had never used makeup before, he was sure to make Maria look bad which was Lucy's idea of revenge after Maria had called her dirty and a witch.

A few minutes passed and Maria's makeover was complete. She had been introduced to bra's by Lucy who made sure it was on the tightest most uncomfortable setting however it counteracted as a pushup bra making Maria somewhat more attractive. Rebecca has painted Maria's nails. Leonardo finished Maria's makeup and when he revealed the outcome all three girls gasped. He had made Maria look more beautiful.

"How did you do her makeup so well?" Lucy asked him

"I am an artist. Makeup is like art" Leonardo explained "I just wish I could have worn it." he sighed

"Oh but you can" Rebecca smirked and she whispered to Lucy about how it would be funny if they could get Leonardo to crossdress into a woman. Surprisingly Leonardo agreed to wearing makeup, a wig, shaving his legs and wearing a dress because he saw it as art and he thought it was truly amazing to be able to change his appearance. Leonardo's makeover was finished and the outcome was unexpected.

"Leo!" Lucy gasped "You actually look like a girl!"

"I feel like I an actor playing a character." he smiled "When I'm dressed like this, call me 'Lea'" he winked whilst pushing his long blonde wig from his eyes. He wore a courtesan style dress from renaissance Italy and he even had the fan to hide behind which could hide any remaining masculine features from his face.

"I bet that guy Ezio would try to make love you to. He would make love to anything that moves" Maria laughed

"Great idea. We should totally prank Ezio" Rebecca said

"I'm up for it" Leonardo shrugged

"Okay, here's the plan" Lucy started and she explained how they were going to prank Ezio. After the explanation she smirked and said "Let the prank begin"

Lucy opened the door to the empty corridor which linked all of the bedrooms together. She crept to Ezio's room hoping not to wake anyone who wasn't interested in the prank and knocked on Ezio's door. After a few seconds he finally answered the door and was surprised to see Lucy standing at the door

"Everything okay signora?" he asked sleepily. He had obviously been far too busy sleeping to even notice that Leonardo was missing from the room

"Umm… yes. Wait - no!" Lucy stammered. She was unsure of how she could drag Ezio away from his room for a few minutes "I wanted to talk to you for a minute"

"Then talk you may. If it's about my services, I usually charge… but I'll do you for free just don't tell anyone." he winked

"It's not about your services… and eww…" Lucy replied

"Then you are wasting my time talking to me at this hour." he said slowly closing the door

"No wait." Lucy answered blocking the door "Okay it is about your services. I was just embarrassed to admit it here because well… anyone could be listening." she said wanting to kick herself. She knew that Maria, Rebecca and Leonardo were listening to the entire conversation and she was not interested in anything Ezio had to offer.

"Very well. We should take a walk and discuss… business." he smirked "Although for you I believe it would be pleasure" he linked his arm with Lucy's and they disappeared down the corridor and towards the stairs. Maria, Rebecca and Leonardo then spilled out of the room. Maria caught the bedroom door before it closed and Rebecca crept into the room with Leonardo. Maria then let the door close and kept lookout. At that moment Altaïr walked out of his room and tapped Maria's shoulder from behind. She turned around and he jumped back in surprise

"Maria! You look… different." he gasped

"Do you like it?" she smiled playing with her curled hair

"No." he answered

"Why not?" she asked "Rebecca said that makeup makes the face look more symmetrical and the eyes look bigger in order to look more feminine and attract more potential mating partners." Altaïr choked on his spit after Maria had said potential mating partners

"What?" he coughed

"Nothing." Maria smiled while she watched Altaïr struggle to breathe.

"I liked how you looked before" he said after he had finished coughing

"Really?" she blushed  
"Yes. Anyway, I wanted to ask you. Why did Rebecca and a girl sneak into Ezio's room?"

"What girl? It was just Rebecca." Maria said in defence

"It wasn't just Rebecca. There was another girl. Where did she come from?" he asked again

"I don't know what you're talking about." she answered. Altaïr sighed and placed his head in his palm and then he looked back up at Maria.

"Okay I must see what's happening there, move please" he said pushing Maria to the side.

"Wait!" Maria panicked as Altaïr headed towards the bedroom door. She grabbed his shoulder spinning him towards her and in her panic she kissed him. He froze. At that moment Rebecca walked out of Ezio and Leonardo's room and closed the door behind her. She looked at Maria and Altaïr and grinned

"She-devil!" a voice boomed from the other side of the corridor. Altaïr and Maria immediately pulled away and turned to see Malik walking towards them "Temptress! Step away from him before I smite you!" he shouted.

"Smite me?" Maria asked in amusement

"Altaïr, you should know better than this. Temptation is the first pathway to darkness. She is the enemy!" Malik cried pulling Altaïr away from Maria

"But-"

"And you!" he said turning dramatically to Rebecca "You should keep this woman under control. Or do you like to see your friend act like a whore?" he said walking towards his room

"What did you call me?!" Maria shouted angrily trying to follow Malik and hit him but Rebecca held her back

"Come on we should go back to your room" Rebecca said

"Hello ladies." Ezio said walking with Lucy. "I see you were looking for your friend. Don't worry she is safe."

"Yes… Lucy we were looking for you everywhere" Rebecca played along

"Also Maria, I love what you have done with your face but I can do more things to your face if you like" he winked. Maria growled viciously but could not fight Ezio because Rebecca was holding her back "Feisty. I like it" he smiled as he walked into his room

As Ezio entered his room he saw a womanly figure lying on his bed. She was facing away from him with long blonde hair. At first he was confused but he shrugged it off, the women had been all over him today so it was no surprise that this mystery woman was waiting for him on his bed.

"Buonasera bellissima (Good evening beautiful)" he said in his most charming voice "What brings you here?" he asked sitting on the edge of the bed and stroking Leonardo's shoulder. Leonardo rolled over to face Ezio and said in the most manliest voice he could make

"Give me your soul so we can make mega-babies!". Ezio jumped off of the bed and ran out of the room screaming in terror. "Love slave! Return to me and pleasure me!" Leonardo shouted after Ezio. Lucy, Maria and Rebecca walked back into the room laughing heavily

"Great job Leo" Rebecca laughed

"No problem. I love scaring Ezio" he smirked


	6. Breakfast

"REBECCA WAKE UP!" Desmond shouted even though he was right next to her. Rebecca awoke with a jump and fell off the bottom of Lucy's bed. Lucy also woke up suddenly but Maria who had already left when Desmond had entered the room.

"Desmond! What the hell?!" Rebecca groaned picking herself off the floor

"Looks like you had an interesting night. Why didn't you sleep in our room?" He asked

"I couldn't sleep. You were snoring." she explained

"Well it's 9 in the morning, everyone else is awake except for you two so get up. We're having a group meeting downstairs." He said and he nodded at Lucy before leaving the room.

"Do you think he watched us sleep for a while?" Lucy asked

"I don't know but if he did. That's just creepy" Rebecca sighed.

The two girls got out of bed and went to use the shower cubicles. Rebecca mentioned something about not dropping the soap and Lucy laughed. After they showered and dressed themselves they went into the main hall for the group meeting.

"You're finally here." Connor said yawning "Take a seat." he gestured towards the row of chairs where the other people sat waiting. Lucy and Rebecca took a seat next to Shaun but far away from Ezio because Lucy was embarrassed to face Ezio after she made him believe that she was interested in his services. Rebecca also noticed that Altaïr and Maria were sat on opposite ends of the room, she also noticed that Malik was sitting next to Altaïr to block Maria's view of him. "Hands up if you're hungry." Connor said. Every person in the room raised their hand. "And do you know why? Because yesterday Maria and Leonardo failed to cook. We only ate cookies yesterday and now it's time for breakfast so I suggest that we choose some other people to cook breakfast this morning."

"You should cook again." Haytham suggested

"Do I look like a slave to you?! I'm not cooking this morning." Connor replied

"I think it's fair that the people who had to cook yesterday should choose who is cooking this morning." Maria said

"Good idea. Who do you want to nominate?"

"I choose Haytham. He's a templar so I know he won't poison the food." she smiled

"Maybe not for you but he would poison it for me so I choose Edward to cook with Haytham" Connor answered

"I am not cooking unless you pay me." Edward stated

"You don't have a choice, we live here together so we will work together until we can find a way to escape this weird animus thing." Connor argued

"I'd like to see you try. I'm not cooking, I'm out of here." Edward said getting up and walking away

"Damn it grandpa. Okay then… I choose Ezio to cook." Connor sighed

"Why me?" Ezio answered

"Because you're Italian and Italian people are supposed to be good at cooking."

"Even me?" Leonardo asked happily

"No!" everyone answered. Leonardo shrunk into his chair

"Who do you choose, Leo?" Connor asked

"I choose Rebecca because she helped me prank Ezio yesterday." Leonardo smiled

"That was you?!" Ezio shouted in surprise

"Wouldn't be the first time I pranked you, no?" Leonardo smiled knowingly

"I'm impressed but I'll have my revenge you cane scaltro (sly dog)." Ezio smirked. Leonardo was not insulted because it was sometimes normal to call each other names.

Ezio, Rebecca and Haytham went into the kitchen to start cooking.

"I'm going to make some american pancakes. What about you?" Haytham said to Ezio

"I'll make coffee. It's great, Italians usually drink it in the afternoon… but I haven't had coffee in too long so I'm having it for breakfast." he explained

"I'm going to fry some sausage and eggs" Rebecca said

"That's very british of you." Haytham said "But you're not british."

"I was inspired by Shaun. He told me how English breakfast has fried meat so I want to try it." Rebecca said

They all agreed and started cooking, when Rebecca started frying the sausage Ezio walked next to her and said

"My sausage is much bigger than that if you know what I mean." he chuckled "Maybe I'll show it to you one day."

"Ezio that's disgusting!" Rebecca shouted

"Ezio are you gay?" Haytham asked

"No, I love women." Ezio explained confused "Why would you think that?"

"Because you just flirted with Rebecca. That was gay."

"How? Rebecca is a woman." Ezio said even more confused

"He's a woman?!" Haytham shouted shocked "But where are the boobs?!"

"You thought I was a man?!" Rebecca shouted angrily

"It's not my fault that your breasts are none existent." he laughed

"You asshole!" she shouted furiously. She pushed Haytham knocking him into a table. Haytham wasn't laughing anymore

"Bitch it was an honest mistake." he said pushing her back

"You're calling me a bitch?! Like it was my fault that you can't tell the obvious difference between a man and a woman!" she said pushing him so that he fell over. He angrily picked up a fish from one of the tables and threw it at Rebecca. It hit her face and she also fell on the floor. Ezio then grabbed Haytham

"Apologise to her now!" he growled

"Why should I apologise when she's the one who became violent?" Haytham complained

"Because you insulted her, now apologise!"

"Defending her won't make her sleep with you." Haytham smiled but Ezio was furious

"That's not why I'm defending her you bastardo!" he shouted and he threw a carton of eggs at Haytham. An angry food fight broke out, Rebecca and Ezio against Haytham. Charles Lee ran into the room when he heard all the noise fearing that Haytham had been attacked. He then joined in the food fight helping Haytham. Connor walked in a few seconds later to check that everyone was working well. When he saw the food fight he was going to shout and tell everyone to behave. But then he saw Charles in the kitchen where he wasn't supposed to be.

"Charles Lee!" he shouted and he tackled Charles to the ground and started fighting. Shaun stepped into the room and received an egg to the face. He then walked out unamused to go and wash his face. Desmond then walked into the room

"Food fight! Awesome." he said and he joined in the food fight laughing not noticing how much hatred was within the room. Malik then finally walked into the kitchen and picked up the pancakes, sausages, eggs and coffee on a tray while expertly dodging all the flying food and carrying the eating food with one arm. He calmly left the kitchen

"Breakfast is served" he said to everyone else who was waiting in the main room


End file.
